Tag: motivation

I’m still in the game

by Allie P., posted in Life as I know it

 

NCSU versus Florida State
My ear made its way onto National Television. I’m a star!

It was the fourth and final quarter. The end zone was only a few yards away, and there was still a chance to retake the lead against the number one rated team in the nation. The fans were screaming as if their will could somehow help carry the play. All the quarterback had to do was find a way through the pain a little while longer.

It this scene had played out in a sports movie, my team would have succeeded. Instead, our quarterback’s muscles cramped up, sending him to the ground. He was spent. The entire team was. Though the team tried its best, the clock ran out, giving us our first (and unfortunately not last) loss  of the season.

Sometimes wanting something isn’t enough. Sometimes the opposition prevails.

As we waited among the line of cars departing the stadium, we listened to the head coach’s post game interview. He said the things I’ve grown to expect from any coach in a similar situation. The team tried its best, but had found themselves outmatched. The game was over, and there was nothing left to do but review the tapes and start planning for the next week’s game. They might have lost the game, but they weren’t defeated.

Success is going from failure to failureAt the office, my boss will often talk about how you don’t truly know the value of a project or a person (customer or supplier) until the relationship has been tested. It is easy to retain your enthusiasm when everything is going well. It’s when things go badly that you truly realize how committed you are to a relationship, a project, a company, or a dream.

Edison discovered 10,000 ways not to make a light bulb. Steve Jobs was fired from Apple. Henry Ford had two failed automotive companies on his resume before launching the model T.

A set back, even a major one, isn’t a failure until you stop trying. Instead it may just be a way of the universe telling to try a slightly different tactic before returning to the field. As I push forward with re-writes and modifications to my marketing plan, I am reminded that it is the rare individual who gets everything right on the first try.

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It would be nice if I had found my sea legs

by Allie P., posted in Life as I know it, Personal Favorites
Sunset at Lake Norman
Red skies at night, sailors delight. Red skies at morning, sailors take warning

Growing up, my dad would occasionally take us out sailing on a nearby lake. There were days the water was as still as glass and the wind refused to fill the sails. On those days we would bake above deck while the boat inched along at a snail’s pace. We could cool off by hopping in the water, but for the most part, those trips were rather boring. We could have swum just as easily at the shore. Other days, the wind would gust. The boat would heave up and down as well as from side to side. On those days, I would worry that we might capsize at any moment, or that I might lose my lunch.

I was taught to look out at the horizon as a way to combat seasickness.

Seasickness is caused by your brain not being able to find equilibrium due to the motion of the vessel. However as much as you rock from side to side, the horizon remains flat and motionless. It provides your brain with a mental anchor point. By keeping your eyes focused on the distance your body is able to subconsciously anticipate where you will be as the boat moves through the water. This can be the difference between enjoying the ride and turning a lovely shade of green.

Several years ago, I heard a song by a band called the Immaculate Machine entitled “C’mon Sea Legs.” The singer is basically giving himself a pep talk throughout the entire song, begging his legs to adjust to the sway of the boat. I particularly like the refrain:

C’mon sea legs, pull yourself together
you’re gonna have to learn to like the rockin of waves
whatever, c’mon now it’s not meant to be easy
but you’re not gonna spend your life bein’ sick over the side

The past week, I’ve experienced a number of up and downs. I was one of several presenters asked to speak in front of eighty people who had come from various points around the globe. Leading up to the event my stomach twisted. I forgot several lines from my prepared script, but what I did remember hit home. I ended my speech to applause, and several attendees approached me later with their compliments on a job well done.

Then I received my manuscript back from my editor. I wanted his honest assessment, and I got it. To say he thinks it needs some more work is an understatement. Based on his recommendations, I am going to have to re-write a significant portion of it, an undertaking that is daunting. A part of me wants to bury the entire manuscript in a drawer and move on to a new idea. A part of me wants to give up altogether.

We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations. — Charles Swindoll

I have to remember that calm seas are boring, and destinations don’t get any closer without a little wind to help push along the way.

I have to stay above deck and keep my eyes on the horizon. I am going have learn to like the rockin of the waves. I have to accept the lows as well as the highs in pursuit of my dream.

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Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

by Allie P., posted in Life as I know it

Harder_Better_Faster_Stronger_by_momentscomic

As I picked up my toddler from day care, his teacher approached me positively beaming. “He attempted to climb out of his bed today at nap time,” she explained with a big grin. Though he sleeps in a big boy bed at home, his bed at day care is one of those portable cribs. To my eyes, there is a fairly significant drop from the railing to the floor below. For many care givers, reporting that a child in their care is putting themselves into a potentially harmful situation isn’t something to be excited about. At least it isn’t something to be positively excited about.

But my little lord tyrant has always had a way of redefining expectations.

In an earlier post, I wrote about how my son has hypermobility and how difficult it was for him to catch up to his peers in terms of motor skills. If that challenge hadn’t been bad enough, according to his last several check-ups, it is likely he’ll inherit his height from my side of the gene pool. Poor thing. My height hasn’t been considered average since before the 1900s. The crib wall comes up to his shoulders. Therefore if he is able to successful pull his entire body weight over that height it is an impressive achievement, even if earns a few new bruises as a trophy.

We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We can make him better than he was. Better...stronger...faster.
We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We can make him better than he was. Better…stronger…faster.

The conversation reminded me about the multiple weeks we spent with the physical therapist. Once he achieved walking, each follow up appointment started by placing him on a baby treadmill. His therapist explained to me that in order to build up muscle mass in his legs, he had to first tire them out. He had to make his muscles strain and suffer in order to build up their strength. The phrase no pain, no gain, came to mind.

Pain is a funny thing. It warns us when there is something the matter so that changes can be made before more permanent damage is done. Without the sensation of pain, you might not realize that you need to remove your hand from a hot pan on the stove. If we are lucky, an unexplained pain can send us to the doctor before a tumor becomes un-treatable. While pain is something most of us would like to avoid, it is a necessary component to continued health.

Pain can also be the world’s best teacher. If we never experienced hurt, and life’s other lows, we would never truly be able to fully appreciate their opposites. If we never pushed ourselves to our limits, we would never fully learn the extent of our capabilities.

I’ve begun work on my third novel. With each project the task has become increasingly more difficult. I am in the process of making a few edits to An Uncertain Faith, and plan to be releasing a new edition in the coming months. Additionally I still have to finalize the cover design for the second project and begin rolling out its release. Finding the time to fit in the writing of a third novel, a sequel, is no easy feat.

But in someways writing the third is significantly easier than writing my first two books. It is a sequel. I know these characters and their setting. I know what it takes to pull their story from my mind and put it to paper. I can plan my schedule accordingly and have given myself a much longer runway. I may at times feel like I am straining myself, trying to do so much, but it’s made my determination to succeed that much stronger.

If I am asking my toddler continue to push himself, the least I can do is to do the same.

Care to solve a puzzle?

by Allie P., posted in Life as I know it

On the very last day of our recent beach trip, a large thunderstorm forced us back into the house several hours earlier than we would have liked. The rental unit was equipped with enough bedrooms to accommodate everyone at night provided everyone doubled up in a room, but during the day it was a wee bit cramped, especially with four small children on the loose. We had to find something to do, and find it fast.

Luckily my mom and sister remembered the puzzle we had packed away for just this sort of emergency. It was brand new, and we quickly dumped all of the pieces on the table surface, eager to get started. The cover was then propped up where it could be seen by all.

English: Puzzle Svenska: Pussel
English: Puzzle Svenska: Pussel (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When we solve puzzles, my family tends to focus on the edges first as they are the easiest pieces to identify and match up. Once the framework has been completed, we begin tackling the interior. We each focused on a section of the puzzle. If you realized that a piece you were staring at for the last several minutes belonged in the other corner, you gave it to the person who was working on that section so that they could fit it in to its appropriate spot. None of us had every worked on this particular puzzle before, but we were focused, determined, and it was finished within the span of Disney’s Little Mermaid.

Goals are a lot like puzzles. Each goal is comprised of several smaller tasks which, if identified properly, link together until the larger goal is achieved. Prior to this trip, my most recent goal was drafting a novel. When I began writing it, I started by defining the characters and the outline. This became my puzzle framework, but also helped me to envision the puzzle’s cover image. Only then did I start filling in the individual scenes, supporting each chapter. Eventually writing got a lot easier. There weren’t that many pieces left on the table to sort through.

When you first pour the pieces of a puzzle out on the table, they seem overwhelming whether there are 1500 pieces on only 300. Once they are out of the box, you have a decision to make. You can either sweep the pile back into the box where they will sit and wait for another rainy day, or you can pick up a single piece and look for its mate. If you are lucky, friends and family might see you working hard and will pitch in. But even if they don’t, know that the puzzle isn’t going to solve itself. The choice is yours.

 

 

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Is your safety net actually a drag chute?

by Allie P., posted in Life as I know it, Personal Favorites
21st annual California Hot Rod Reunion
21st annual California Hot Rod Reunion (Photo credit: ATOMIC Hot Links)

Over the last few weeks I have watched a few of the blogs I follow sign off for good. The authors were moving on to other day job challenges and no longer could put in the time to write. Considering one of my goals is to find a way to write more, their choice was somewhat puzzling to me, but I respect that they made the decision that worked best for their personal situation.

The Lonely Vacuum Of Space
The Lonely Vacuum Of Space (Photo credit: JD Hancock)

As I am often inspired by other bloggers and entrepreneurs, I found myself in a bit of an inspirational vacuum this week with their departure. I was going to have to take desperate measures. I decided to go for a jog hoping that might help get the creative juices flowing.

Not being a fan of the cold, I did not manage to stay in peak physical condition over the past winter. I found myself walking well before I reached my destination. I scolded myself. I told myself I was going to have to sprint to make up the time. I saw a stop sign in the distance and promised myself not to let up until I reached it.

Then my legs started to hurt and I thought to myself, well that’s close enough, it’s a nice day and there aren’t exactly bears chasing me. I’m still burning calories. I walked the rest of the way home.

But what if I there had been bears. Could I have made it to the stop sign, or would I have been lunch? Would I have found a way to suffer through the pain, or would I have rolled over and succumbed to the inevitable?

Sometimes I have to wonder if my safety net is actually working against me.

The Dark Knight Rises (1 of 2)
The Dark Knight Rises (1 of 2) (Photo credit: Brett Jordan)

There is a scene in Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight Rises where Bruce Wayne is stuck in a pit. He can escape anytime he wants, provided he can somehow scale the nearly unbroken vertical wall. He is even given a safety rope to keep him from plummeting to his death.  His captors are not entirely monsters after all. After several failures, Bruce Wayne decides to forgo the rope. This time he reaches the distant ledges and pulls himself out. Hurrah!

By tying the rope around his waist, he was subconsciously telling his brain that failure was an option. As a result his adrenalin didn’t spike to the necessary levels and his muscles didn’t propel him far enough.

I didn’t want to push my legs too hard as I wouldn’t have been able to walk home. My ability to walk home was my safety net and I wanted to protect it. However by doing so, I allowed myself to fail my original goal. Just like the chute that is deployed out of racing vehicles, my safety net held me back.

In this case the failure just hurt my pride. Abandoning my safety net in pursuit of a small personal goal wasn’t worth the risk. However for goals that really matter, failure should not be an option. Sometimes in order to get what you really want in life, you have to be willing to risk everything.

 

 

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