Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

Harder_Better_Faster_Stronger_by_momentscomic

As I picked up my toddler from day care, his teacher approached me positively beaming. “He attempted to climb out of his bed today at nap time,” she explained with a big grin. Though he sleeps in a big boy bed at home, his bed at day care is one of those portable cribs. To my eyes, there is a fairly significant drop from the railing to the floor below. For many care givers, reporting that a child in their care is putting themselves into a potentially harmful situation isn’t something to be excited about. At least it isn’t something to be positively excited about.

But my little lord tyrant has always had a way of redefining expectations.

In an earlier post, I wrote about how my son has hypermobility and how difficult it was for him to catch up to his peers in terms of motor skills. If that challenge hadn’t been bad enough, according to his last several check-ups, it is likely he’ll inherit his height from my side of the gene pool. Poor thing. My height hasn’t been considered average since before the 1900s. The crib wall comes up to his shoulders. Therefore if he is able to successful pull his entire body weight over that height it is an impressive achievement, even if earns a few new bruises as a trophy.

We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We can make him better than he was. Better...stronger...faster.
We can rebuild him. We have the technology. We can make him better than he was. Better…stronger…faster.

The conversation reminded me about the multiple weeks we spent with the physical therapist. Once he achieved walking, each follow up appointment started by placing him on a baby treadmill. His therapist explained to me that in order to build up muscle mass in his legs, he had to first tire them out. He had to make his muscles strain and suffer in order to build up their strength. The phrase no pain, no gain, came to mind.

Pain is a funny thing. It warns us when there is something the matter so that changes can be made before more permanent damage is done. Without the sensation of pain, you might not realize that you need to remove your hand from a hot pan on the stove. If we are lucky, an unexplained pain can send us to the doctor before a tumor becomes un-treatable. While pain is something most of us would like to avoid, it is a necessary component to continued health.

Pain can also be the world’s best teacher. If we never experienced hurt, and life’s other lows, we would never truly be able to fully appreciate their opposites. If we never pushed ourselves to our limits, we would never fully learn the extent of our capabilities.

I’ve begun work on my third novel. With each project the task has become increasingly more difficult. I am in the process of making a few edits to An Uncertain Faith, and plan to be releasing a new edition in the coming months. Additionally I still have to finalize the cover design for the second project and begin rolling out its release. Finding the time to fit in the writing of a third novel, a sequel, is no easy feat.

But in someways writing the third is significantly easier than writing my first two books. It is a sequel. I know these characters and their setting. I know what it takes to pull their story from my mind and put it to paper. I can plan my schedule accordingly and have given myself a much longer runway. I may at times feel like I am straining myself, trying to do so much, but it’s made my determination to succeed that much stronger.

If I am asking my toddler continue to push himself, the least I can do is to do the same.

Care to solve a puzzle?

On the very last day of our recent beach trip, a large thunderstorm forced us back into the house several hours earlier than we would have liked. The rental unit was equipped with enough bedrooms to accommodate everyone at night provided everyone doubled up in a room, but during the day it was a wee bit cramped, especially with four small children on the loose. We had to find something to do, and find it fast.

Luckily my mom and sister remembered the puzzle we had packed away for just this sort of emergency. It was brand new, and we quickly dumped all of the pieces on the table surface, eager to get started. The cover was then propped up where it could be seen by all.

English: Puzzle Svenska: Pussel
English: Puzzle Svenska: Pussel (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When we solve puzzles, my family tends to focus on the edges first as they are the easiest pieces to identify and match up. Once the framework has been completed, we begin tackling the interior. We each focused on a section of the puzzle. If you realized that a piece you were staring at for the last several minutes belonged in the other corner, you gave it to the person who was working on that section so that they could fit it in to its appropriate spot. None of us had every worked on this particular puzzle before, but we were focused, determined, and it was finished within the span of Disney’s Little Mermaid.

Goals are a lot like puzzles. Each goal is comprised of several smaller tasks which, if identified properly, link together until the larger goal is achieved. Prior to this trip, my most recent goal was drafting a novel. When I began writing it, I started by defining the characters and the outline. This became my puzzle framework, but also helped me to envision the puzzle’s cover image. Only then did I start filling in the individual scenes, supporting each chapter. Eventually writing got a lot easier. There weren’t that many pieces left on the table to sort through.

When you first pour the pieces of a puzzle out on the table, they seem overwhelming whether there are 1500 pieces on only 300. Once they are out of the box, you have a decision to make. You can either sweep the pile back into the box where they will sit and wait for another rainy day, or you can pick up a single piece and look for its mate. If you are lucky, friends and family might see you working hard and will pitch in. But even if they don’t, know that the puzzle isn’t going to solve itself. The choice is yours.

 

 

Is your safety net actually a drag chute?

21st annual California Hot Rod Reunion
21st annual California Hot Rod Reunion (Photo credit: ATOMIC Hot Links)

Over the last few weeks I have watched a few of the blogs I follow sign off for good. The authors were moving on to other day job challenges and no longer could put in the time to write. Considering one of my goals is to find a way to write more, their choice was somewhat puzzling to me, but I respect that they made the decision that worked best for their personal situation.

The Lonely Vacuum Of Space
The Lonely Vacuum Of Space (Photo credit: JD Hancock)

As I am often inspired by other bloggers and entrepreneurs, I found myself in a bit of an inspirational vacuum this week with their departure. I was going to have to take desperate measures. I decided to go for a jog hoping that might help get the creative juices flowing.

Not being a fan of the cold, I did not manage to stay in peak physical condition over the past winter. I found myself walking well before I reached my destination. I scolded myself. I told myself I was going to have to sprint to make up the time. I saw a stop sign in the distance and promised myself not to let up until I reached it.

Then my legs started to hurt and I thought to myself, well that’s close enough, it’s a nice day and there aren’t exactly bears chasing me. I’m still burning calories. I walked the rest of the way home.

But what if I there had been bears. Could I have made it to the stop sign, or would I have been lunch? Would I have found a way to suffer through the pain, or would I have rolled over and succumbed to the inevitable?

Sometimes I have to wonder if my safety net is actually working against me.

The Dark Knight Rises (1 of 2)
The Dark Knight Rises (1 of 2) (Photo credit: Brett Jordan)

There is a scene in Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight Rises where Bruce Wayne is stuck in a pit. He can escape anytime he wants, provided he can somehow scale the nearly unbroken vertical wall. He is even given a safety rope to keep him from plummeting to his death.  His captors are not entirely monsters after all. After several failures, Bruce Wayne decides to forgo the rope. This time he reaches the distant ledges and pulls himself out. Hurrah!

By tying the rope around his waist, he was subconsciously telling his brain that failure was an option. As a result his adrenalin didn’t spike to the necessary levels and his muscles didn’t propel him far enough.

I didn’t want to push my legs too hard as I wouldn’t have been able to walk home. My ability to walk home was my safety net and I wanted to protect it. However by doing so, I allowed myself to fail my original goal. Just like the chute that is deployed out of racing vehicles, my safety net held me back.

In this case the failure just hurt my pride. Abandoning my safety net in pursuit of a small personal goal wasn’t worth the risk. However for goals that really matter, failure should not be an option. Sometimes in order to get what you really want in life, you have to be willing to risk everything.

 

 

Enhanced by Zemanta

Are you a supporter or do you truly believe?

When I was in high school I played basketball in a church league. I have to qualify my league of play because I am not exactly what anyone would describe as being tall. My high school’s coaches would have laughed me off the court had I shown up for try outs. My team was made up of several other like-minded individuals. We were there out of friendship rather than talent.

In other words, we were awful. I fouled out many of those games because I had a better chance of preventing the other team from scoring than actually making a shot myself.

We were so bad that the opposing team’s fans cheered for us when we managed to score a basket.

You might think that other teams would have been made up with the same caliber of misfit and be equally terrible, but you’d be wrong. Our opponents were also affiliated with religious organizations, but were religious high schools. They had access to the cream of the crop rather than just making do with random volunteers. My poor coaches didn’t stand a chance.

Washington Generals, I feel your pain. We went into each game knowing that we were going to lose, but determined to have a good time anyway. We would call out words of encouragement to each other from the bench. Good Hustle! Nice pass! But it was never enough.

Then one season some new recruits joined our little team. These girls had game. We started lose only by single digits. Then only by two points. Suddenly we were ending games in the W column. It was like every single feel good sports movie you’ve ever seen, only it was my reality.  The opposing team’s parents stopped cheering for us when we made our shots. We were a real threat. Our coach no longer allowed us goof off during practice. She tasked us with working harder we accepted. We began to believe we had a chance.

We finished my last season second in the league.

When I first published An Uncertain Faith, I heard a lot of people say, great job. I wish I could do something like that. I sold early copies to friends and acquaintances willing to support me in my dream. Then months after it was published one of my friends told me, “I read your book, and it was good. I mean, I would have liked it even if you weren’t the author.” She supported me, but her surprise, while extremely complimentary, proved she hadn’t been a true believer up until that point.

Co-workers began to ask me how far along I was with book project two. I gave status reports such as when I hit the 50% and 75% mark on my first draft. I started telling them how I was doing with the blog and what I was learning along the way. I can tell you the exact moment when many of my closest friends, family, and co-workers stopped merely supporting me and started to actually believe in me. I saw the change in their face and in the tone of their voice when they asked their questions.

Their tone became sharper, harder, but not in bad way. Just like my old basketball coach, they were more serious in their interest. I returned the tone in kind. I wasn’t talking about a hobby. I was telling them about my business. I was working hard and it was showing.

I am now only a month away from finishing up the initial first draft of my second novel. I am no longer only shouting words of encouragement at myself from the bench. Cheering my efforts, but not visualizing the win. I believe in myself. I believe that I have the determination to accomplish my goal.

 

Believe in yourself, push your limits, experie...
Believe in yourself, push your limits, experience life, conquer your goals, and be happy. (Photo credit: deeplifequotes)

 

Enhanced by Zemanta

Staying positive is tough, but I’ve always liked a challenge

English: Think positive
English: Think positive (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My husband and I visited several parts of Australia for our honeymoon. While there we were entertained to learn that there was an entire news program dedicated to Happy News. The other programs were following the pattern of increasing the scare factor in order to generate ratings, but this program had decided that they were going to focus on the inspirational and feel good pieces.

Watching the program was like eating a scoop of sorbet after a meal, a delicious palette cleanser. I wish I could say we watched more of it so that they might have gained a few ratings, but we were on vacation and I didn’t want to stay in front of a television all day. I do hope the program stayed true to its principles and is still on the air.

Several years ago, I watched Michael Moore’s film, Bowling for Columbine which takes a look at school shooting and explores the factors that may or may not have allowed that terrible event to occur. Whether or not you agree with his politics, he does bring up an interesting comparison between the nightly news in the US and the nightly news in Canada. In his film, the US program made much higher use of flashy graphics and scary headlines, or endangering a reporter without need, as means of compelling a viewer to tune in than its Canadian counterpart.

Breaking News
Breaking News (Photo credit: morner)

When I decided to venture into the world of blogging, I did so with trepidation. I had read the comments section on sites like Yahoo and You Tube. People can be so cruel, especially when they don’t have to use their real name. I truly wish I could say that I was still shocked by what people are willing to put in writing.

I’ve attended leadership and management classes as well as read several books on the subject. Time and time again, I have been told about the importance of addressing negative behavior immediately before it has a chance to fester within the team. Because unchecked, that’s exactly what it will do. The casual cruel comment tends to make a person defensive, tempting them to lash out in retaliation or worse, against an innocent bystander.

As leaders, we have to confront these issues head on. Nip it in the bud. We cannot afford to be afraid of confrontation. Courage, professionalism, and respectability can be equally contagious.

It takes one positive thought to change your l...
It takes one positive thought to change your life, just one positive thought. So why spend your time thinking negatively? (Photo credit: deeplifequotes)

When I began blogging, I decided early on that I wanted to maintain a professional and mostly positive tone.  The best way to inspire others is to lead by example. I found a free site called social-searcher.com which analyzes everything I post on my blog, on Twitter, or Facebook and assigns it into a category such as positive, negative, or neutral.

Occasionally I get a red square next to one of my posts. I do enjoy satire and dry humor. My attempts to be funny typically get flagged as negative, but overall I am proud to say that I have been in the green more often than not.

 

 

 

I encourage you to check out your own stats some time using this tool, then click on the analytics tab. Next ask yourself are you happy with your results?

 

Enhanced by Zemanta